Dream: A man knocked on the door of the home I shared with my parents and brother.  My brother apparently thought we were expecting a package delivery, despite that it was so late at night.  My brother opened the door without even checking who was there.  Suddenly a fat man with a gun pushed his way past my brother and pulled out a hand gun.  I realized that the man was going to hold us hostage.  I remembered that my father had always told me that if someone broke into our house, he would use his gun.  However, I realized that my father wasn’t even going to be able to get his gun since the man was holding us all in the living room together.  I managed to get away by asking if he would let me go to the bathroom.  I walked down the hall to the bathroom and was able to get my cell phone on the way.  I tried to call 911, but unfortunately, because I have MetroPCS, which frequently gives me problems, the call did not go through.  Somehow I was able to call my mother’s best friend, even though I do not know her phone number and she lives in another state.  I pleaded with her to help me, but I could tell that she wasn’t going to.  She kept saying she couldn’t hear me and kept asking why I was calling, but I couldn’t speak louder because I was afraid the man with the gun would hear me.  I hung up with her and again dialed 911.  This time I reached an operator and was able to get help.  She stayed on the phone with me as the police arrived.  I hung up once the police came up to the bathroom window.  I begged them to help me, but they refused, saying that they were just going to wait for the man with the gun to give up.  They backed away from the window.  I was terrified that no one would help, so I decided that I would have to help myself.  I slowly opened  the bathroom door to check that the man with the gun was not nearby.  That’s when I noticed that my mother and brother were in a bedroom down the hall and the TV was on.  I quietly called out to them and told my brother to come into the bathroom.  I opened the bathroom window, pushed out the screen, and pushed my brother up so that he could climb out of the second story window.  When the police saw what we were doing, they rushed over to help.  We followed the same procedure with my mother and then my father.  I was the last one to climb out the window.  During this dream I had thoughts of possibly being killed in order to save my family.  I felt afraid of dying and afraid of the unknown, but I was willing to take the chance that I would be killed.  I thought of how I’d recently become more religious, and I felt satisfied that I had lived the best life I could up until this point.  Upon meeting outside, my mother suggested that our entire family go to a restaurant at a mall behind our house to eat dinner.  I agreed because I knew that the police were just going to keep waiting for the man to give up, so we wouldn’t be able to return home for some time.  We went to the mall, which looked very much like Grand Central Station inside, but then I realized that my father was not with us.  We began looking for him, but I became more and more afraid that maybe the man with the gun would go out the back door of our house and come to the mall to kill us.  In looking for my father, my mother and I also lost my brother.  As we looked for them I ran into the first and second people in command at my office.  The first in command was doing a book signing on the stairs.  I ran up to him and asked for help, but he simply gave me a signed copy of his book and said he couldn’t help me.  The second person in command did nothing more but smile and quickly move in the opposite direction.  I suggested to my mother that we call my dad and brother on their cell phones, but she said we wouldn’t be able to reach them because their phones were always turned off.

Analysis: Recently I watched an episode of The First 48 where an individual knocks on an apartment door and then kills the man who answers the knock.  I think the whole scenario in this dream came from that show.  I am surprised that in the dream we were such a close family who worked so well together.  I can’t really picture that in real life, but it’s something I would hope for.  The idea that no one would help me was constantly repeated, and I think this reflects my belief in self-reliance.  Of course, we all want to have others we can count on and we want to believe there are people who will rescue us.  Honestly, I think most people who are successful work very hard and are self-motivated.  I have been thinking about this issue a lot as I begin to try to write a novel.  Instead of just listening to all the people tell me that I should be a writer, and waiting or hoping in vain that something would come of it, I’ve decided to force myself to write a novel.  The higher ups at my office gave a talk recently and it made me realize that although there is an “open door policy” and although they claim they’re around to help, they’re really not.  One seems more interested in notoriety and the other seems distant and cold.  I have a delusion that one day I might be able to earn a living by doing something that doesn’t require working for someone else.  I would love to be my own boss.  And all of this ties into my recent study of the Eight Noble Truths, specifically right livelihood.  (For a great discussion on right livelihood, check out Bad Buddhist Radio, Episode 12.)

Dream: A prosecutor was standing beside my bed and woke me by loudly exclaiming repeatedly, “Lola, I can see your breasts.”  I was annoyed that he had woken me needlessly.  I was indifferent about his attempts to bother me and asked him for a plea offer on a case.  He kept focusing on my breasts, instead.  I refused to pull up the covers because I wanted him to know that I didn’t care that he could see my breasts.  Eventually, he gave up and left, so I got dressed and went outside.  Outside of my apartment there was an area with caves and swamps.  I was with my boyfriend and we were looking at a river, when I noticed that there were many alligators peeking out from the water.  Just then I also heard an electronic or ambient music soundtrack, and I realized as I awoke from the dream that my dreams have soundtracks.

Analysis:  The particular prosecutor from this dream is especially annoying at times because he always attempts to get his way by trying to prey on ignorance.  Some time ago he asked me if I was willing to stipulate to my client’s number of prior felony convictions for the purposes of my client testifying.  I refused to blindly stipulate and then asked how many certified convictions the prosecutor had in his possession.  He began reading a list of my client’s alleged prior convictions, but it turns out there was no paperwork to prove that in the file.  Current caselaw in Florida indicates a prosecutor can’t ask about prior convictions without the certified paperwork, but this prosecutor wanted to see if he could sneak one by me.  As far as the soundtrack, I had left one of those new agey nature music CDs in my alarm clock, so I think that explains the music.

Dream: I was at my apartment overlooking the beach with my boyfriend who was on the couch reading a local newspaper.  I looked over his shoulder and saw an ad for Alcoholics Anonymous.  The ad contained a photo of a man at the beach suggesting others attend a beach meeting.  I was horrified when I noticed that the man in the ad was Tdawg.  I told my boyfriend that it was Tdawg and I was afraid because the ad clearly meant he had moved back to Miami.  I told my boyfriend that I was afraid that Tdawg moved back to Miami to stalk me.  Then I looked out my sliding glass doors onto the beach and noticed that Tdawg was in the water looking right back at me.  He smiled and I waved.  I couldn’t believe that he could see into my apartment.  I felt scared because I realized he had probably been watching me for a significant amount of time before this day.

Analysis: Near the time that I ended my friendship with Tdawg, I told him that I believed that he was an alcoholic.  However, in my dream I was not relieved by the fact that Tdawg was apparently attending AA meetings.  Sometimes I wonder if he ever got help.  Yesterday I finished a trial where my client was accused of stalking.  One of the witnesses said she was terrifed of my client, yet she went out and made contact with him.  I couldn’t understand why she would do such a thing.  Yet in my dream I also took the step of waving to Tdawg, rather than just ignoring him or calling the police.  I think in the dream, despite my fear, I secretly enjoyed the attention.

Dream: My boyfriend and I were near work when it began snowing.  Suddenly everyone was outside having fun and there was a huge festival happening because of the snow.  One of our more abrasive coworkers was running a ski jump, although she was instructing teenage boys how to do it by speaking in a combination of Italian and other languages that she only partially knew.  I walked by a band dressed entirely in white that was playing alternative music on a hill.  I went into the bathroom when suddenly another coworker and one of my aunts barged in and began talking about how they would redecorate with mirrors and by opening blinds.  I left the restroom and met up with two women in their 30s who were shopping for shoes and handbags.  As we were leaving the store, one of them began singing.  I met my boyfriend outside and was telling him about the singing, but he told me, “She’s not really singing.  She’s lip-synching, just like in the movie.”  I paused to think about this because I realized that he was saying something very important.  However, I soon forgot because I was hungry and wanted to go home to make dinner.  We were debating whether we should go to my apartment or his, but ultimately we decided to go to mine.  While we were there, much of his extended family showed up, including relatives with babies.

Analysis: I’m lost as to what this dream means.  My boyfriend told me that we watched a James Bond movie involving a ski jump yesterday, but otherwise I have no idea where these images came from.  I do find his comment in the dream interesting because it seems that he is comparing our lives to the plot of a movie.

Dream: My mother and I were trying to find the restroom in Borders when a woman she knew left the cafe area and came over to us.  The woman suggested that my mother might be able to get a job there, despite the fact that my mom is disabled.  The woman acted as if the job was so easy and the pay so generous that no one should miss such an opportunity.  I didn’t really think my mother should be considering getting a job, so I tried to herd my mother into the restroom and encourage her friend to leave us alone.  Her friend took the hint and moved back to the cafe counter, but seated at a nearby table Regis Philbin yelled out to us.  He was also giving my mother career advice.

Analysis: I am not sure what this dream means.  I think possibly it symbolizes my need to have alone time with people with whom I am close, without interruptions from others.  Any comments or analysis would be appreciated.