One of our first fights was at Christmas when I was14 years old. She bought me thermal underwear that didn’t fit. When I told her that the gift needed to be exchanged, she said, “Oh, I didn’t know you were that fat.” From that moment on I never again called her “Nana” and only called her Frances. My grandfather had always called her Frances when he was annoyed with her, and I knew she hated it. I also only wore black around her. I began to realize why my father avoided Frances and why my mother is so cold.

He was a great lawyer until he met his clients’ girlfriends, who could get him anything he wanted.  Manchester was a people person who could talk to anyone, talking his way into or out of anything.  But he couldn’t see all the great things I saw in him, and he lacked self-esteem.  Perhaps I was just his enabler.  He went to rehab, but I think lying is one of his deeply ingrained survival mechanisms.  The revolving door that opened and closed for him at rehab crushed his dreams a little.  I still have hope that he will recover for good.

Matt has the makings of a future televangelist, except he’s a Buddhist. He threw in some anecdotes about the frustration of being the only man at a workplace filled with women. For a moment I expected him to peel back his face and show that he is Joel Osteen underneath. He has a friendly and compassionate way about him that makes it impossible not to like him. He made me feel comfortable on my first day at a Buddhist center, which left a huge mark on my life because I decided to return for future classes due to his kindness.

I was 12 years old, and she was maybe eight.  She constantly came over to see if I could play.  My father began to question her interest in me and told her I was busy.  She continued asking, so he told her to find someone her own age.  She was the first person I knew who had a different last name than her mother.  Her father abandoned their family when she was younger.  She had a hamster that she always held very tightly, and I wondered if she did that because she was afraid that he would leave her too.

He was a skinny kid who played the violin.  I thought he was OK, but then he bullied my brother.  He constantly teased and tortured my brother on the way to school, at school, and on the way home.  I had dreams about murdering Kyle violently.  He was the first person I truly wished would die.  However, eventually I felt sympathetic towards him.  I saw how none of the other kids really liked him, how he’d lie to try to increase his status among the other kids, and how his parents didn’t love him.  He made me appreciate my family.