Blawgalicious

Dream: Dying Baby Pet Octopus

Lola — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 18:26:25 +0000

Last night I dreamed that Manchester gave me a pet baby octopus as a gift. Unfortunately he already bought the octopus before the tank was set up. It was reminiscent of the time in real life Manchester wanted to give me goldfish for my birthday but to this day has the tank sitting on his living room floor with no fish. So the small little octopus was kept in a plastic bag filled with water at the store, waiting for us to set up the tank. I kept going back to the store every day to check on it, but I noticed it was changing from a blue/purple color to brown and was moving around less. Eventually I told the store owners to put the octopus back in the tank or it would die. As one of the owners released the octpus into the tank, instantly it started to get better. The brown faded and the inky color came back, and it was swimming with another octopus, which I assumed was its mother. At this moment in the dream I realized that the octopus symbolized my relationship with Momo. I felt relieved and happy that the octopus was doing better, but I felt extremely sad that it wouldn’t be my pet.

I feel sad and lost.

Lola — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 05:58:47 +0000

Momo moved back to his country this week, which makes me feel sadder than I would have expected. When I think about the circumstances under which we met, I never would have expected us to have a relationship, nor for that relationship to be so important. I miss him terribly and am hoping the best for him. Although we will be able to call each other whenever we want, he has asked me to write him letters because he wants to have something to look forward to and wants to save them. So next week I am going to begin writing, which will be quite a challange. The only letters I have ever written in Spanish are formal letters to tell my clients that they failed to show up in court and that the judge issued an arrest warrant. I know nothing about informal greetings or closings in Spanish letters, so I am hoping to find someone who will tutor me in this area. Even though Momo just left, I already can’t wait until the day that I can see him again.

101 in 1001: Stop Using Disposable Utensils at Lunch

Lola — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 01:52:07 +0000

About two months ago in my efforts to be greener I purchased and now use daily real silverware and dishes at lunch. For the longest time I was eating every meal out. I began eating at my office because it’s less expensive, and it’s healthier because I’m less tempted to eat too much or to choose unhealthy options. Well, once I started eating at my office I also started using plastic silverware, paper plates, and even before that I was using several plastic or styrofoam cups in court and in my office daily. Now I eat my lunch on real dishes and with real silverware, which somehow makes eating lunch at my office seem better. I take a travel mug of ice water to court with me and either drink water throughout the day from that or from an oversized coffee mug in my office. The only negative is that now I have to do more dishes, but I think the benefits outweigh that.

101 in 1001: Weigh 145 or Less, Be Able to Run 3 Miles Without Stopping, Part II

Lola — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 02:25:49 +0000

I went to the gym today and actually ran one mile without stopping, which is something I probably haven’t done in about nine years. This certainly wasn’t the fastest that I’ve ever run a mile, but the point is that I did it, and it’s a step in the right direction toward my goals. Recently I also started taking vitamins. I now take three caplets which contain B complex, Vitamin C, Folic Acid, B-12, Iron, Calcium, and Vitamin D. I feel less fatigued and more energized. I think these vitamins are going to be good for me in general, but will make me healthy enough to enjoy exercising.

101 in 1001: Visit a Japanese Style Garden

Lola — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 01:39:01 +0000

I went to the Ichimura Japanese garden after work today. I was the only person there. It was quite peaceful. The only sounds were the rushing water, insects, and lizards, and the rustle of plants. I will definitely return in the future. It seems like a great place to meditate, think, or just relax.

101 in 1001: Make a List of Personal Commandments

Lola — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 03:11:49 +0000

I was reading this post that is part of the blog about The Happiness Project. The author suggests that you should make a list of personal commandments to live by. I think for a while I’ve had this idea in my head. So my list is below. I didn’t want to make mine a list of ten commandments per se, but I couldn’t think of anything to add or delete. Here’s the list, in order of importance:

1. Let go of attachment.
2. Love everyone, including yourself.
3. Live passionately, tempered by wisdom.
4. Be responsible for your own happiness.
5. Know that love never fails.
6. Don’t allow fear to rule.
7. Almost doesn’t count.
8. Accept the things that you cannot change.
9. Fight injustice.
10. Do no harm.

1. Let go of attachment.
This has been my primary focus for a while. Letting go of attachment is a Buddhist ideal. If everyone was able to let go of attachment, we wouldn’t have nearly as many problems as we have now. Attachment is a sickness of the mind, a delusion. People believe that the causes of their problems are external, but really the causes are internal. The cause of unhappiness is people’s toxic attachments.

2. Love everyone, including yourself.
Loving all beings is another Buddhist ideal. I added “including yourself” because although people usually have a tendency toward self-grasping, or thinking that they are the most important beings, there are also many people who suffer from low self-esteem or otherwise don’t love themselves and take care of themselves.

3. Live passionately, tempered by wisdom.
A friend of mine once described me as passionate, saying that there’s often no middle ground for me. I either love something or hate it. However, it’s important not to let your passion for life run wild. You still want to make wise decisions.

4. Be responsible for your own happiness.
This goes back to the delusions and attachments people have. Once you realize only you can make you happy and that the way to find happiness is to let go of attachment, you’ll realize that no one ever has the power to make you unhappy again.

5. Know that love never fails.
This is from the Bible verse 1 Corinthians 13:4. It’s hard to remember, but it’s very important, which is why I added this to the list.

6. Don’t allow fear to rule.
I sometimes seem to suffer from what seems like paralyzing anxiety. Also, I sometimes find that I plan too much and am not spontaneous enough.

7. Almost doesn’t count.
Half-trying isn’t an excuse not to do something. I think if you have something that you want to do, then you should do it rather than telling yourself you can’t do it, and then justifying failure by saying you tried.

8. Accept the things that you cannot change.
Inspired by the serenity prayer, which my father repeated to me many times as a child.

9. Fight injustice.
I always used to tell my parents that something wasn’t fair. Their response was usually, “Life’s not fair.” I never found that answer acceptable, which is part of the reason I became a criminal defense lawyer. I feel like if you witness injustice and don’t do something about it, then you are allowing injustice, if not contributing to it.

10. Do no harm.
An idea prevalent in medicine, green perspectives, and Buddhism, I believe that every person should try to lessen his or her negative impact on the world.

I’m thinking of going to church.

Lola — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 03:14:04 +0000

Ever since I became friends with Momo I’ve been thinking about going to church. He is a very spiritual person, which I find extremely attractive. Momo has encouraged me to go to church, although not in an annoying or preachy way. I’ve also wanted to go as one of my 101 in 1001 goals. As a child, my mother took my brother and I to church all the time, and I think that this was such an important decision. Going to church so much when I was younger has completely made me the person that I am today. However, the church that we went to was non-denominational, which leaves me now trying to figure out what type of church I should attend.

First, let me tell you my criteria for a church that I could enjoy (in order of importance):

1. Beautiful Architecture
2. Tolerant, Non-Preachy, People Who Don’t Seem Like Child Molesters
3. Singing Should Be Completely Optional
4. Pastors Should Not Yell Or Resemble Televangelists
5. Collection Of Money Should Be Non-Obvious and Optional
6. Tolerable Parking Conditions
7. Should Offer A Service In Spanish
8. Services Should Not Be Too Interactive
9. Not Required To Jump Through Hoops To Become A Church Member

(Can you see why I’ve been attending Buddhist services? Lol.)

Here are the options I’m considering (in alphabetical order):

First United Methodist Church of Miami
400 Biscayne Boulevard
Miami, FL 33132
Services: Sunday 10:55 a.m.

Plymouth Congregational Church, Universal Church of Christ
3400 Devon Road
Coconut Grove, FL 33133
Services: Sunday 10:00 a.m.

St. Hugh Catholic Church
3460 Royal Road
Coconut Grove, FL 33133
Services: Sunday 9:00 a.m.

I don’t know how well any of these churches meet my above criteria, but I’m willing to find out, and I’m willing to consider other options.

I’m thinking about changing my hairstyle.

Lola — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 15:29:22 +0000

This weekend I have been thinking about dyeing my hair. Between the sun and the pool and the ocean my hair is turning kind of orange. See Exhibit 1:

I’m thinking of dyeing my hair a dark brown or almost black but not blue-black. I haven’t done it yet because I think hair dyeing is kind of vain, and also I’m concerned about the constant upkeep required. Incidentally, this style below is also similar to the haircut I’m considering. See Exhibit 2 :

That haircut is very similar to a haircut I’ve had before. See Exhibit 3 below for the picture I took to the salon as a guide for my stylist:

However, if I were really adventurous and not a lawyer doing jury trials, I’d get the style and color below. I don’t have the nerve to actually do it, but it’s a style and color I’ve thought about several times. See Exhibit 4:

I’m still debating what to do as far as the dyeing. Whether I dye or not, I am definitely going to get the long, layered haircut seen in two of the above photos.

My Vampire Kitten

Lola — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 00:41:11 +0000

I should warn you that he’s actually not a vampire kitten, he’s just mid-yawn, which makes him look a lot fiercer than he is.

He called me.

Lola — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 23:30:22 +0000

Momo called me today from work, unfortunately I missed two of his calls. Blah! Thanks MetroPCS! My phone was in my pocket on vibrate, and of course gets no bars in parking garages and in elevators and in certain areas of my office and certain courtrooms and…. Well, you get the picture. It didn’t even ring. I tried to call his cell phone, but it’s still “temporarily” out of service. At least I know he’s alive and he went to work. But I still haven’t talked to him and still don’t know what happened to him. This might sound super girly and needy and slightly crazy, but I really like him and miss him and hope there’s some reasonable explanation for everything.